Required Prom Memorandum Prohibits Dirty Dancing

students are required to sign a new Prom Memorandum to attend the prom on April 16. The policy was revised to prohibit after received reports of sexually explicit dancing at a school dance in February.

The dance style known as grinding, or freaking, was described as simulating sex and included girl's skirts being lifted. Chaperons had no systematic way to stop students.

The new policy was finalized March 11 by school administrators and leadership students in hopes that it will put an end to grinding. Students are required to sign the revised Prom Memorandum before purchasing the $100 prom tickets.

The policy gives chaperons the authority to remove offenders and protects the school district if students file a complaint. It reads in part, “Students who dance in an inappropriate lewd and lascivious dancing manner such as freaking will be asked to leave the dance and will not receive a refund of the admission fee, nor will they be eligible to attend the next school dance. Appropriate dancing is up to the discretion of the chaperons and will not be debated!” Specific language includes “No straddling legs of your partner, No dancing back to front, No touching of breasts, buttocks or genitals” and “No hands on the floor.”

Students are not happy, especially about the front to back rule. “Pretty much everyone dances like that,” says high school senior Maria Herd. “They'll just grind front to front instead. Usually it's in a big group so they won't be able to stop everyone. I don't know how they are going to control it.”

Generational differences are suspected. “Some of the dancing is out of control but I think they are going overboard on the dancing policy,” says Herd. “To them it's not appropriate, but it's part of our culture. They are imposing their rules on our generation.”

“The dancing is not a big deal and it's not just our school,” said an 18-year old student. “I understand that they are trying to make a better, safer place, but they have to understand that things are not the same as they were when they were young.” The flip side is, if it makes anyone feel uncomfortable it can be considered sexual harassment.  

Herd agrees with the no hands on the floor rule. “I'm glad because that is inappropriate. No one wants to see someone bent all the way over.”

Another senior added, “I understand why they are doing it because some people are disgusting when they dance and need to be punished, but it's not everyone. They are grouping the whole category of freak dancing.” One student suggested that chaperons focus on the biggest offenders. “It's really obvious who is dancing dirty. If you took those 50 students out of the picture then our dances would be fine.”

The new policy was adopted four weeks before the prom. “It's going to take a while for people to adjust if they are going to enforce these rules,” said Herd. “Many people are not going to prom because it's expensive and they won't have fun.”

The consequences are too harsh, says one student: “If they turn you away at the door because of what you are wearing or if you get caught dancing inappropriately, your parents have to drive all the way to the city to get you.” If parents are unavailable, offenders would be turned over to the San Francisco Police Department.

The memorandum also bans inappropriate attire such as dresses shorter than fingertips, bare midriffs, plunging necklines, low backs, see-through fabrics, excessive cleavage and high slits in dresses. Examples are posted on the high school website. Girls are frustrated because of the short notice; some have bought dresses and had them altered and can't return them. 

An anonymous Benicia High dad had an idea: “If I find out my daughter is doing this, her mother and I are going to show up and dirty dance, too. That should put an end to it!”

Other students who commented were Lindsay Craig, Emily Smith, Christa Pizella and Katie Wright, who are all 18, and Jenna Haddock, 17.